Customs – Marriage, Christmas

Marriage

The Bride Price - Barlake

Traditions of barlake vary from place to place, commonly include the giving of certain gifts most often from the man’s family to his future bride and her family. In olden times, these gifts were considered a promise between the two sets of parents to keep their children together as a married couple and to look after them as their own children.

The family of the future groom, his brothers, first cousins, uncles and brothers-in-law may give tais, animals such as cows, goats and pigs, and belak, an ornament which men wear around the neck.

In one area, after the man’s relatives give their barlake, the girl’s family will give something such as rice, which means the girl knows how to cook, a tais to hang on the man’s shoulder and a male pig to kill to feed the people who attend the ceremony.

If the groom does not have enough money to pay the price all at once, he can give as much as he can on the day and pay the rest in installments. He must finish before his mother-in-law or father-in-law dies.

In earlier times the Timorese people practised bigamy and the women called each other “sister” without animosity.  The first wife was the “biin boot” (big sister) and the successive wives were “alin feton” (younger sister).

Christmas

Traditions used for Christmas in olden times are still used by many people today.  People gather together from 24th of December until 1st or 3rd of January.

To prepare before Christmas people try to buy eggs, goats, cows. They weave katupa, a woven container in which rice is cooked. They cook saboko, food wrapped in banana or other edible leaves, and tukir, meat and other ingredients cooked in bamboo.

In olden times the parents or children were not worried about presents but they focused on good food for the day of the celebration.

On Christmas Eve the children, whether married or single, stay together in their parents’ home. If they are married, they share their time with parents from both sides, although mostly they celebrate with the man’s relatives. At midnight, all go to the church for Mass and afterwards go home to eat with the family. Many people dance until the next morning.

On December 25th, the children go to greet their godparents asking for their blessing. They also go to greet the elders.  Many godchildren from the mountains bring animals to offer to their godparents such as pigs, goats or chickens. The godparents in return give them whatever they can afford because in the mountains one godfather can have more than twenty godchildren.

School students perform for their parents, relatives, administrator and teacher. People come from all the surrounding villages to perform tebedai and bidu (dances) during the Christmas and New Year.  The Liurai and Xefe suku organise these events for the special days.